Monday, February 13, 2012

US National Toboggan Championships

My second annual best-name winners among the teams competing at the 22nd annual USNTC, held at the Camden Snow Bowl this past weekend.

Four-person teams

Gold: Morning Wood
Silver: Disproportional Vikings
Bronze: Eat More Kale
Honorable Mention: Team Testicular Fortitude

Three-person teams

Gold: 3 Empty Mugs
Silver: Pulseless
Bronze: 2 Dirty Old Men and Kim
Honorable Mention: Sled Dog Millionaires

Two-person teams

Gold: Nothing to Luge
Silver: Throbbin Boggins
Bronze: Chute, I'm out of Beer (up one place from last year)
Honorable Mention: Soupcon de Plunder (mostly because I have no idea what it means)

Once again, my winners do not correlate well with the real winners. Also, remember that I experience the races from the comfort of my computer, and thus, unlike most judges, am subject to none of the following: bribes, appeals to my better self, the temptation of pretty faces or outrageous costumes, frozen writing fingers. I can be bought only by bad puns and existentialism.

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